Table of contents:
- Is it fair to have doubts about your partner before marriage?
- How to deal with doubts before marriage?
- 1. Express your doubts
- 2. Undergo therapy
- 3. Go on vacation for a moment
- 4. Postponing marriage
It is normal to feel nervous and anxious before the wedding. However, it turns out that having doubts just before marriage is a condition that must be questioned. Is it natural to have doubts before marriage? How to solve it?
Is it fair to have doubts about your partner before marriage?
In fact, doubts that occur before getting married are common but unnatural. These feelings can actually have an impact on your future marriage if left unchecked.
A study from UCLA involving 464 couples revealed that those who were hesitant to marry their partners were more likely to divorce after 4 years than those who did not. This is because they live in the shadow of their feelings of insecurity for their partner, so that their marriage becomes unhappy.
For some people, it can be difficult to admit feelings of doubt about their partner, especially just before marriage. He had spent so much time choosing to ignore those doubts.
However, hesitation before marriage is not a sign that you should cancel the marriage. All you have to do is find out the root cause of the problem before making such a big decision.
How to deal with doubts before marriage?
First of all, you shouldn't deny it. Denial keeps everything under wraps and can lead to an unhappy married life. Plus, these feelings won't just go away once you commit to one another, so it's important to acknowledge your doubts about your partner.
1. Express your doubts
One of the foundations of a strong relationship is communication and openness. If you are not open with your partner, how could he or she know that you are having a problem.
Tell him about the doubts before marriage. It may be difficult not knowing how your partner will react, but it's better than keeping it to yourself.
This method is indeed risky because your partner could be offended, but it doesn't hurt to try to find a way out together. Isn't your partner someone you trust to spend until the end of your life?
2. Undergo therapy
If you and your partner or you choose to tell an expert in the end, no problem. Therapy can help you to reformulate your thoughts around these doubts, from the background to the resolution.
In addition, a qualified therapist can certainly help you figure out how to deal with anxiety and highlight what not to say when talking to your partner.
In addition, this process will also help you to briefly distance yourself from negative views of your future by seeing how your relationship with your partner will take shape.
3. Go on vacation for a moment
Try to clear your mind by booking tickets out of town and stay away from all matters related to weddings. This will allow you to find out what you are going to miss about your partner and to find the root of this problem.
In addition, taking a vacation alone is also effective for enjoying your solitude before marriage and overcoming feelings of doubt about marrying a partner.
4. Postponing marriage
Delaying does not mean canceling. If doubts before marriage persist and your partner doesn't support you at all, reconsider whether you are ready to get married. If not, share your problem with your family and friends to get their support.
If you still can't find the root cause of this doubt, one way is to postpone the marriage. This can be done so that you can remember why you chose your spouse as your spouse, so that you are more confident and determined to marry him.
Marriage is a sacred bond which is certainly not to be played with. Therefore, doubts before marriage often tarnish this. However, if handled properly, the chances of having a happy home life are very large without being overshadowed by uncertainty about your partner.
