Table of contents:
- Is being picky in your partner a good thing?
- What's wrong with being too picky in your partner?
- Tips for finding the right match
- Has the same basic principles
- Find someone comfortable to talk to
- When with him, you can be yourself
Choosing a partner cannot be arbitrary. Especially if you plan to make it a life partner. So you are advised to consider many things so you don't choose the wrong choice and regret it later. However, many people are actually wrong and even seem too picky in their partners to end up harming themselves.
Is being picky in your partner a good thing?
Choosing a partner is of course good. Being picky can lead you to the right partner you've been looking for. Being picky also has the advantage of having dignity and thinking about your future.
Imagine, if you easily accept dating requests from anywhere without considering other things beyond that, it is possible that you are stuck with the wrong person and are just wasting your time. That way, there's nothing wrong with being a pretty picky person in relationships.
However, keep in mind that being choosy sometimes needs to be controlled. Do not let you keep looking for the mistakes of your partner who are actually very trivial. For example, a partner's physical deficiencies that can be tolerated actually. That means you are too picky in your partner.
What's wrong with being too picky in your partner?
From the results of research conducted at the University of Western Sydney, it was found that women tend to be more selective than men. Jo Barnett, an American romance therapist states that when someone looks for a man with a specific list of wishes, such as having a height of 180 cm with a thin mustache and short-cut hair, he is in the category of being too picky.
Because women who have this list of wishes will only date men who match the list. In fact, this does not guarantee that she will find a man who is really good for her. Well, this is usually a factor that causes the biggest failure in a relationship starting from the first meeting.
You have to realize that finding a partner who is equal and totally to your liking is very difficult. If you want a happy relationship, then give the person you feel comfortable and comfortable with by not sticking to the list of criteria you want.
Put it all back on your goals in relationship. Are you looking for a partner to lift your economic status, for example? Or does your partner have to be physically perfect in order to show off? If that's your reason for looking for a partner, you should reconsider your goals and criteria for finding a partner.
Tips for finding the right match
Regardless of all the list of criteria that you have, understand the following tips to choose the right partner for you, including:
Has the same basic principles
The first thing you need to look for when choosing a partner is common ground. The reason is, the same principles and future perspectives are very important when choosing a life partner. For example, you and your partner both agree that privacy is something that should not be violated even by your partner.
Find someone comfortable to talk to
Another important criterion for determining the right partner is being comfortable to talk to. Over time, this quality will be much more important than physical appearance, assets, and position. The reason is, later in your old age when you and your partner return to live together because the children have their own place to live, all you will do is chat.
When with him, you can be yourself
Choosing a partner who makes you comfortable in front of him and can be yourself is an important thing to consider. Even though it sounds cliché, you will find the freedom to express yourself without fear of your partner feeling ilfeel or angry about your silliness.
