Table of contents:
Many people, both married and unmarried, say that the first year of marriage is the most difficult. Usually this is because the early days of marriage are a time of adjustment for both. In addition, the initial year of marriage is also the time for couples to build a household foundation that will determine their future household journey. So, is it true that the first year of marriage to be the hardest time as most people think?
Many problems arise in the first year of marriage
Rachel A. Sussman, a relationship expert at Sussman Counseling in New York states that people who experience various problems in the first year of marriage are usually those who do not thoroughly discuss problems that occur during courtship or when approaching before marriage. Couples who experience this usually don't discuss important enough things such as:
- Daily habits
- The division of time between work time, time alone, and time for family
- Financial Problem
- Division of household chores
In addition, the various challenges and differences that occur can also contribute to adaptation problems between the two parties. Various other important things that usually trigger a fight, namely:
- Outlook around future plans
- Different ways of solving problems
- Have a different decision
- Put forward each other's egos
According to Ronald Katz, Ph.D., a relationship therapist in New York, revealed that these problems occur because couples who are in the early years of marriage still do not realize that they are one unit.
Therefore, small differences that are not as desired can be a debatable issue due to prioritizing each other's egos. In addition, both parties were not yet aware of the real commitment they had made.
Communication is the main key in marriage
That is why marriage therapists emphasize the importance of communication before, during, and after the marriage process takes place.
Try to find communication patterns for you and your partner so that problems that arise as a result of bad communication can be avoided. By improving communication patterns, you and your partner will always try to find a middle ground for every problem that occurs.
The point is to realize that you and your partner are no longer two different people with different goals. However, you and your partner are now a unit that needs to strengthen each other to achieve common goals.
Sussman stated that marriage will definitely present its own challenges. But that doesn't mean it can damage the happiness of the newly married couple.
In fact, all the challenges that usually arise in the first year of marriage can be used as learning material to anticipate the possibilities that might happen even greater in the future.
Because no marriage takes place without conflict. However, a healthy marriage consists of two people who always struggle together to overcome differences for mutual happiness.
