The dangers of toxic positivity for your mental health plus tips on how to avoid it

Ever heard toxic positivity? This term is like a paradox; between a positive throw and a negative emotion, which is poison for those who receive it. This is because not everyone needs positive advice to bring himself better when faced with a problem. Want to know more about this? Here's the full review.

What is that toxic positivity?

Everyone has problems and this can make him feel vulnerable. When he seeks relief from a problem he is experiencing, he will usually tell someone he trusts.

For example, suppose you were expelled from your job because of a reduction in employees due to a pandemic. Then, your best friend tries to make you feel better by saying, "Look on the bright side, you can get a better job than the current office."

There may also be people around you who are saying, “Sure okay you can still get a new job There's still something worse, really, the case than you. "

Unfortunately, this response that tends to be positive is the opposite of how you feel. The reason is, people who are facing problems tend to want to be understood about their position at that time. Well, a piece of the story above is an example of toxic positivity.

So, simply put, you interpret toxic positivityis the belief to maintain a positive mindset no matter how dire or difficult a situation is.

The bad effects of toxic positivity for mental health

When faced with a problem, positive thinking is one of the keys to overcoming it, as reported by the Mayo Clinic website. Why? When problems are present and you become anxious thinking bad things might happen, it can make your thinking even more complicated.

Instead of getting a solution, these thoughts that tend to be negative can keep problems from being resolved, build up, and lead to stress.

That is why, most people think to always think positively when faced with problems. Unfortunately, this assumption is not entirely correct.

The reason is, the positive thinking that you use as a shield to face problems also has its limits. This is because if it goes too far, positive thoughts will turn into poison for you.

When you hear advice that is of a nature toxic positivity,it doesn't make your condition any better. It could even get worse, especially for those of you who are easily stressed or have had a mental illness, such as depression.

There are several reasons why toxic positivity it is harmful to the mental health of people who are struggling with problems, including:

Generates a feeling of being blamed

When someone is having a hard time, they need to acknowledge that the emotions they are feeling are true. Therefore, he will share their problems as well as their emotions to a trusted person in order to feel more relieved.

Unfortunately, he instead received advice that sounded positive but gave rise to the feeling that what he was feeling was something wrong.

Makes someone avoid real emotions

When someone gets toxic positivity, he tends to silence the emotions he feels. If emotions are actually being covered up and feeling "okay" from sticking to positive sound advice, this will make him avoid situations that make him uncomfortable.

As a result, it will also discourage him from facing situations that make him uncomfortable or afraid. Like a glass that continues to be filled with water, of course the water will overflow when the container is full. Now, if the emotions you feel are not expressed, at any time they can explode. Likewise with problems, will accumulate and worsen your mental condition.

A sign that you are being deceived toxic positivity

Someone who is consumed by this positive impression is not obvious. However, you can recognize the signs through the following:

• Choosing to avoid or ignore problems rather than facing them and finding solutions.
• When you have a problem, you start to beat yourself up, get angry or be disappointed in yourself.
• Hiding your real feelings or emotions, and feeling that you are "okay" can give you the impression of accepting the situation.
• You may belittle other people who don't think positively when they are faced with a problem.

Tips to avoid toxic positivity

No one person can control so that happiness continues to envelop his life. Sometimes problems come. When you are hit by a problem, one way you can take it is to tell the closest people, whether family, lover, or friends.

Storytelling at least makes you feel relieved, because the burden on your heart can at least be lifted. Be candid, even if it's hard. Storytelling can relieve anxiety, compared to you having to pretend to smile and bury the emotions and problems you face.

However, when you talk about your problems to those closest to you, be careful toxic positivity.If at any time you face it, follow the steps below so as not to be consumed with this positive impression.

• Manage your negative emotions, that is, don't deny them but don't get out of hand. The reason is, negative emotions can cause stress if controlled. However, they can also provide important information that can bring about beneficial changes in your life.
• Be realistic about how you should feel. When you are faced with situations that stress you out, it's natural to feel stressed, worried, or even afraid. However, don't sink into the situation. You have to rise up to seek out the condition
• Instead of avoiding difficult emotions, allow yourself to feel them. Expressing these emotions is much better than avoiding them. You can cry, if you need to express sadness and disappointment. However, afterwards try to get rid of these emotions slowly.
• When you have difficulties in life, express your emotions in a productive way, for example keeping a journal. Research shows that putting what you are feeling into words can help reduce the intensity of negative feelings that arise.

Learn not to be

There are times when you are faced with problems. However, there is also a point where you become a listener for those with problems. Sometimes, you don't realize that what we say becomes toxic positivity for them.

When a friend tells you about the problem he is facing, try to imagine that you are in his position. Being empathetic to her is a way that can make her feel more understood.

You can convey empathy for their feelings for what they experienced. For example, in the case of friends who were expelled from work. "I'm sorry that you were kicked out of the office. Naturally, you feel disappointed or angry in your current condition. "

This kind of statement at least makes them feel appreciated because someone is able to understand their feelings. In some cases, the optimistic statement just becomes toxic positivity. Therefore, have empathy, because we also want to be understood when problems hit.