5 Guidelines for dealing with children who talk harshly & bull; hello healthy

Do you have children who argue or talk harshly to you or other people? Nowadays, it is not surprising that children are very critical. Asking lots of questions is a good thing for children to do. Even when your child is actively speaking, you shouldn't shut him up. However, sometimes children imitate what we think is not good. For example, when children are able to engage in sarcasm, do something rude (like rolling their eyes when you advise them), or speak harshly when told or when their desire is not achieved.

Sometimes, when kids talk harshly to you to attack you to have control over yourself. There are also those who say harshly as an expression of their emotions when there is something they disagree with, feel that something is happening to them that is unfair, or when they feel that everyone does not understand them. Then, how to handle it?

What constitutes harsh speech?

There are some words that cannot be accepted in society and are considered as inappropriate talk. Children sometimes imitate these words from songs, movies, the internet, and television shows. In a sophisticated era like today, technological advances are indeed beneficial for children's development, one of which is that children can learn from several different sources. However, the progress of the times can also make children too free to receive information and less filter the information they get.

Often times, popular culture teaches children that it's cool to talk harshly to one another, and that kids are attracted to things that are considered 'cool'. There are several categories of harsh speaking such as swearing, shouting, refusing your orders (as the parent), calling your name (as the parent). This is considered disrespectful. There is also other disrespectful treatment that can range from being annoying when trying to make a deal with him, to verbal abuse accompanied by harsh treatment. However, according to several sources, the disrespectful treatment by adolescents is normal, because at this stage adolescents want to separate from their parents and want to be themselves.

How to deal with children who talk harshly and do other rude things?

Disrespect comes from children who do not know how to solve problems and are not yet aware of the importance of mutual respect. Especially when children are usually separated from their parents on a daily basis, at that time they find out for themselves how to do it right. It is the duty of parents to always guide children to respect and respect others. What can you do?

1. Don't take it personally

You can be hurt because of what your child says, but you need to remember that children's emotions are not stable, they can explode at any time. Instead of letting yourself get hurt and angry, you should be able to just say that he shouldn't say things like that when he does cross the line. You can speak firmly and kindly, "Don't speak like that!", Then don't let your child respond. After speaking firmly, immediately turn around and leave the same room as the child.

You should let them know in person that their behavior is wrong. If he doesn't listen, you can use punishments that "scare him", such as when he repeats his actions, then he will be banned from playing with gadgets, until he promises not to repeat his actions again. It doesn't matter if your child doesn't like this rule, it is best to tell him what to do and what not to do. Also ask yourself what you would like to teach your child.

2. Prepare yourself

One day your child will grow up to be a teenager. At this time, teenagers will often do things that are rude, including saying harsh words. You don't have to get into every fight, it will make him even more stubborn. Target your limits, to what extent you need to argue, if you can't, turn around and leave the debate. Sometimes this will make your child feel guilty. Of course, before leaving the room, you should emphasize what is acceptable and what is not.

Every parent has different limits for their children. Make sure you prepare for what you will face and apply it to your child. Convince yourself that this is the right thing to do. Don't give up, when the child says harshly again. Look for weaknesses in the child and you can pay for the consequences when he does the same again.

3. Try a different strategy

Is your child increasingly rebellious and rude to you? He's trying to be in control, this is when internal dialogue needs to take place. First, you have to always remember, don't take his words to heart, they will make you burn with anger too and lead to bad arguments. The first time your child talks harshly and is no longer afraid to do it, he will continue to do it. Your job is to get him to change his behavior. Whenever your methods don't work, you should try to think about what to do next if things happen again. Think of words of reprimand that your child didn't guess.

4. Become a teacher and trainer for children

Think about when you were their age, what did you want from your parents? Do you want to be supported by your parents? Want to be noticed? Or do you just want to be heard? Being a teacher means that you have to try to see from multiple points of view, so that your child will follow you. You have to guide them in the right behavior and encourage them to behave in the right way. Set target boundaries when they are wrong. The point of changing a child's behavior is not only to respect you as the parent, but so that he can interact with the wider world without respecting each other.

We certainly hope that someday children will be successful financially and be accepted in society, it is our duty to train children to achieve their dreams without having to underestimate or do bad things to others.

5. Try not to reprimand him in public

A teacher at school may be able to do it, but as a parent it can embarrass him. Apart from that it could be two things, your child may not want to repeat it again, it could also be that the behavior will get worse in the future. It's better if you solve the problem privately, your child will focus more on listening, not on feeling embarrassed about being reprimanded in public.