Table of contents:
- Hold your emotions when you catch your partner watching porn
- Then, have a good talk
- Couples watching porn, it's not your fault
- If he is addicted, then this is not natural
Your feelings may be mixed up randomly when you catch your partner watching porn. Want to get angry because you feel "seconded", but also shock and confused trying to find the reasons what most likely make him moved to play a porn movie without your knowledge. So, how is the wisest way to deal with this condition?
Hold your emotions when you catch your partner watching porn
The first thing you need to do after catching your partner watching a blue movie is to stay calm and don't panic. If you feel like going on a tantrum, immediately extinguish it by closing your eyes and breathing slowly to a slow count of 10.
Your angry outburst will actually make your partner more defensive and fight until they turn angry too. If you have this, rest assured that bickering is inevitable. What is, the problem will spread everywhere and you will not get the real answer.
Remember that you are not catching and interrogating a thief who has been caught stealing. You only have to come at the wrong time. After all, he is still your partner and you both are committed to going through the hard and the fun together.
Then, have a good talk
Even so, staying calm doesn't mean you can just stay quiet and act like you don't know anything until it ends up burying all the resentment in your heart alone. After asking your partner to clean up and put on clothes again (calmly and casually), invite him to have a heart-to-heart chat.
You can ask him what his motivation is to watch porn and ask him to answer honestly. It's also okay to tell your partner if you feel hurt, resentful, disappointed, or sad to see him watching porn secretly.
But remember again, ask all your questions and complaints in a relaxed tone and cool head; not aiming to corner it. Do not also show a face full of emotion, even though you may be annoyed to death.
Listen carefully to your partner's explanation until it's finished, without interrupting the conversation. Tell him your desire to talk about this is purely to ask for an explanation from him and at the same time to find the best solution for mutual happiness.
Couples watching porn, it's not your fault
As with sex, you can compromise the two of you after considering how much effect watching porn has on your relationship. For example, by making certain restrictions, such as in what situations and / or how many times he can watch pornographic films.
You can also suggest certain hours without the device at home. All of these things are useful to divert attention from the desire to watch porn so that they can spend time alone together.
However, you also need to understand that it is normal for men to like pornography. Especially for men, the urge to watch porn comes naturally to let go of the passions that have been holding back.
Apart from the fact that their bodies are more easily aroused, watching pornographic films or things is a way for men to explore their bodies and learn about their own sexual desires.
If he is addicted, then this is not natural
Porn movies are not always a sign that your household is in trouble. However, if the partner is already showing "symptoms" like this:
- So couples prefer to watch porn than have sex with you.
- His "hobby" makes couples neglect their daily responsibilities.
- Couples find it difficult to be aroused without being provoked by using porn videos.
- Couples are always secretive and use various excuses to watch pornographic videos.
- The couple refused to talk about the porn videos he watched.
This means you may need help consulting a household consultant or sex therapist to resolve this issue. Do not underestimate the problem of addiction to pornography because it can damage your household.
