Table of contents:
- 1. Follow your instincts, be yourself
- 2. Smile
- 3. Start small and don't miss the opportunity to have a small greeting
- 4. Stop apologizing
- 5. Build two-way communication
- 6. Be a good listener
- 7. Don't forget to give compliments
- 8. Don't give unsolicited advice
- 9. Exchange business cards and don't forget to contact them again
- 10. Dare to take risks and don't be overly taken with rejection
- Remember, you are not the only one who is awkward socializing
It can be difficult to reach your career and life goals if you do it all by yourself. It takes several heads from various circles to contribute to achieving this goal. This is where the role of the connection network is needed in your life.
However, for introverts, just getting to know other people you don't know can make you lazy, let alone have to communicate to build connections. People who have an introverted personality, especially when coupled with their shyness, are sometimes labeled as people who don't like hanging out with new people and making connections. But don't worry, if you are an introvert, it doesn't mean you will continue to have trouble building connections.
Here are some ways you can build a connection:
1. Follow your instincts, be yourself
Basically, humans are social creatures who need one another. According to the expert, actually humans are not naturally shy, but something happens to them so that they don't want to open up. Sometimes, even for introverted people, when they hear that introvert nature is inseparable from the word "alone", their instincts as a social being will encourage the person to occasionally get out of their introverted nature.
Plus, don't forget to be yourself. Sometimes, people who are introverted think that they have to act like an extrovert in order to build a connection. Being yourself is the best, be yourself who is not outrageous but sincere and humble in building connections. In other words, it's okay to be a little awkward, just don't keep apologizing about your awkwardness.
2. Smile
This seems trivial, maybe people don't even think about it anymore. Sometimes at an event, you are too busy figuring out how to open the conversation until you forget that you are walking with a sullen face. Serious, sullen, angry faces are scary things. People will be more happy to meet people who smile and say simple words like good morning, have a nice meal, and so on.
3. Start small and don't miss the opportunity to have a small greeting
If you feel too intimidated to meet people you really don't know, start building connections with people you already know, such as relatives or friends. Building connections doesn't always have to start with people you don't know at all. Another tip that is quite easy is to build connections from your friends during school or college. Sealmamater friends are golden targets of establishing connections. So, don't be afraid to contact your friends again while you are still studying, who knows they will become part of your network of connections and can work with you.
If you are also shy, attend events that match your interests. With this, you can build a connection by expressing what interests you in the event. Building connections is not about looking for common interests, but how you express your interests. If there is someone at the event that you really don't know who wants to meet you, welcome the invitation. If you are in a "networking" session, ask the event organizers to help you introduce yourself.
Or maybe, take your friend to the event, ask your friend to introduce you. Being introduced is easier than suddenly coming to a stranger. What if nobody introduces you? Take a deep breath and strengthen your confidence. It's always better to try than to miss an opportunity.
Once you know the person's name, address the person by their nickname. Experts argue that people prefer to hear their own name. So, in communicating, don't forget to mention the person's name. Doing this will make the other person more comfortable, feeling like you and the other person already know each other.
4. Stop apologizing
People who are introverted and socially awkward sometimes apologize because they think that making connections and chatting with strangers is something that annoys other people (because they themselves often feel annoyed when strangers reprimand them). In fact, networking is one part of building a relationship. If you keep apologizing, it shows that you lack professionalism and self-confidence. Don't keep apologizing if you ask your connections for help or ask your connections for advice. It could be that in the future, your connections will need you.
5. Build two-way communication
It is much better to communicate both ways than someone else leading the communication and you react passively. If you lack confidence in spontaneity, here are some tips you can do:
- Prepare what you will talk about to open the communication. Also prepare answers that are likely to be asked by other people, for example, what is your job, what are your interests, and so on.
- Try to write down your questions first. For the opening stage, your questions don't always have to be too difficult to answer, for example:
"What attracted you to this field?"
"What is your hobby?"
"What do you dream about in your future career?"
The questions above may sound asked very often, but they can be a good place to start communication.
6. Be a good listener
People who are introverts are usually good listeners. Being a good listener is not an asset to stand out in public. However, this skill can leave a very strong impression on people when communicating. Listening in detail and asking questions that are difficult for the person to answer can help you build meaningful connections.
7. Don't forget to give compliments
Every human being must feel happy when he hears something good said by others to him. Give compliments to the person you are talking to. But keep in mind, make sure that you really praise the person you are talking to and don't over-compliment. Think first, if you think there is no need to give praise, then there is no need to force praise.
8. Don't give unsolicited advice
You can discuss a variety of matters with the person you are talking to, but avoid giving unsolicited advice. Unsolicited advice, such as:
- "You shouldn't be working too much."
- "You shouldn't be watching TV"
- "If I were you, I would ………"
Advice like this is much easier said than done. You have just developed a relationship with the person you are talking to, it does not mean that you are meddling in their business.
9. Exchange business cards and don't forget to contact them again
Business cards should always be carried with you whenever you are making a connection. Business cards are the easiest way to leave your name with the person you are talking to, so they will always remember you. Exchanging business cards also builds your credibility. If you have promised to contact the other person again, don't forget to contact them again. By doing so, you show that you hold on to what you have promised, it will leave a good impression on the other person. If not, you could be labeled as a "talkative" person.
10. Dare to take risks and don't be overly taken with rejection
In building a connection, resistance may occur. It is a common thing. So, don't take it too seriously. It's all part of the process. When you get over rejection, it will be easier for you to open up conversations with people you don't know. Take the risk of opening the conversation, it could be that the person sitting next to you is just as introverted as you. In fact, maybe that person is a very pleasant person to talk to. You never know if you don't try.
Remember, you are not the only one who is awkward socializing
Keep in mind, however, that you are not the only introverted person wherever you are. It could be that the person sitting next to you or standing opposite you is also feeling excited and confused about how to start a conversation. Instead of sitting still and ending up boredom, try to open up a conversation. It may be that you don't get a response, or the conversation isn't what you expected, but it's also possible that it becomes a fun conversation that you will miss if you don't try it.
If you never try to open up, then you will never be able to make connections. If you feel like you are more than an introvert, and socializing makes you feel panic or anxious, then go to a therapist to help you understand what's causing it and come up with a solution.